Busted!
by XxKuroyoxX
Summary: Written by VBR & I, if you like midgets, mustaches, lassos, high jinks, boomerangs or LAUGHING, you must read this! Here are the secrets and untold stories of DBZ that funimation wouldn't let us see! Revealed to you by all forms of disregard for privacy
1. Intro

**KURO HERE!!:Everybody be afraid...it has happened, me ((XxKuroyoxX)) and Ro ((Veggie Blue Raven)) have combined our craziness and insanity and made a fic together!**

**RO-CHAN TAKING OVER!!: If you do not know who we are then you are in for a wild ride BUT i shall not give anything away, you have to read...so hold on to your hats**

**KURO PUSHING HER WAY IN!!: KEEP your hands, tenticles and tails to yourself at all times ((WE do not want any law suits on our hands)) **

**RO-CHAN PUSHING BACK!: and enjoy our fic-OUCH! DON'T MAKE ME HOG TIE YOU!**

**KURO: JUST TRY IT WOMAN!!  
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**Disclaimer: We no own any DBZ characters, we do own ourselves though o.o so DO NOT STEAL US!  
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**~INTRO**~

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WELL ladies, gents, aliens, and woodland creatures, this is Kuro and Ro-Chan (aka VeggieBlueRaven). We have recently embarked on a mission to interview the Z sensei, along with various other villains and characters that don't get enough LOVE and end up with serious drinking problems. *cough cough* Dende *cough*

Aided by a strange mix of insanity, curiosity, general lack of common sense, and a strong will to survive, we shall travel into their lives and uncover the truths that Funimation didn't want you to see. Everything you had suspicions about, we shall, at risk of life and limb, discover and report it here for your enjoyment and piece of mind. You may start thanking us at any time. Seriously, we DESERVE it!

Although the journey will no doubt be deadly, with all these Saiyans and powerful fighters to interview about things they thought they could hide away, we will do it because WE ARE CRAZY and think it will make a great fic! YOU PEOPLE BETTER LOVE US FOR IT!! AND GIVE US COOKIES, AND SEND US LOTS OF FIRST AID IN THE MAIL!!! BUT ESPECIALLY COOKIES!!

However, not only will we interview, we shall SPY for the pure evil enjoyment of it! Thereby finding out all that we can! We will also do it for the enjoyment of dressing up in crazy costumes so they don't know who we are. Yay! Wearing mustaches is fun. So are midgets…=P

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**How It All Started - The Auditions**

'Camera static, how very interesting.' Turles thought, eyeing the TV screen with distaste as he folded a small piece of paper. Why did they have to make him sit here and do all this boring stuff? He was a TV star now! (cough, cough, Eat it Kakarott! cough) This is what he had lackeys for! What was the point of having lackeys if you still had to do the boring stuff yourself? This was the 52nd video audition he'd watched today and he was dying of boredom in this little dark room. Why did they have to do this in a little dark room anyway? Why couldn't it be in a BIG dark room? One that had those cool glow in the dark star stickers on the ceiling? He liked big dark rooms like that cause then he could pretend he was out in space taking over planets with his henchmen instead of being forced to pay attention to his work. Ah, how he missed having henchmen, they were better than lackeys but more expensive too.

Turles growled in irritation, the little dark room was filled with TV producers, all of which happened to be just as boring as the TV static on the screen. It was too bad he'd gotten fired from being a bad guy, being a bad guy was a cool job. Scratch that, it was the BESTEST most AWESOMEST job in the whole wide world! Turles sighed loudly and continued folding his little piece of paper "Would you look at that" he murmured "A swan." Dang he was good! Fingering the small origami piece thoughtfully, he grinned and quickly whipped it at the nearest producer.

Said producer was not so pleased...in fact, said producer was now unconscious. It may have only been paper, but having it thrown at you by a Saiyan made it feel like taking a brick to the head. Ever had a brick to the head? Yes? No? Maybe? Of course, it's not like you would remember anyway, bricks usually come with the side effect of being knocked out followed by brain damage and memory loss. So who knows, maybe you have!

Finally the screen appeared to show more then just static.

"YES!" the Goku look-alike shouted before he noticed the truth. It was all blank. Kami that was sad, an empty black screen was now the only thing to cheer for in this room. And who cheered for black screens? Nobody, that's who. Why? Because black screens were BORING, just like STATIC. Come ON people!

"Okay, okay, it's on!" a female voice sounded, although the screen was still black. Turles sighed, he had seen this before. The damn cameraman forgot to take off the lens cover, there had been about 15 cameramen that had done the same thing today. One guy had left the camera lens on for the whole audition, the WHOLE freakin' thing! Oh, what a lovely twenty minutes THAT was!

"KURO!" a male voice shouted "You need to take off the lens thinga mabob!" Oh great, he uses THINGAMABOB, this should be interesting. Turles just loved it when they used technical jargon. What was next? Did he forget to turn on the doohickey? Or maybe he needed a wachamacallit.

Suddenly light filled the screen as a picture came into view...it looked like a huge green eye. Turles stared at the screen. Well, it wasn't an empty black screen anymore, but this was sort of freaky.

"Hey, don't use that tone of voice with me!" he heard the female voice again. Ooo, now it was a large _angry_ eye. Scary…

Suddenly, the camera flipped around and it settled on a male figure. The man ran his hands obsessively through his little fringe; obviously thinking that it wasn't perfect enough.

'Why,' Turles thought blankly, 'is he messing around with his fringe when the rest of his hair is the messiest I have ever seen?' It was true! The guy's do was completely messed up, more so then his! And that was saying something, since he was a Saiyan and they always had freakishly messed up hair. How Turles got his hair to sit like that he didn't much care, hair products didn't interest him any. He didn't need them, his hair was naturally freaky.

The man sighed, slumping forward slightly. "Fine, I'm sorry Kuro, but this is an AUDITION! I cannot mess this one up! Not like the last one…" he whined.

"What do ya- ohh you mean when the Me and Twin came in wearing those leotards-"

Turles cocked his head to the side. What were they talking about? Didn't this guy know the tape was already rolling? Get on with it man!

"YES DAMNIT THAT TIME!" the guy huffed, looking quite flustered. Quickly composing himself, the man cleared his throat and straightened out his shirt - then again started playing with his fringe.

"STOP PLAYING WITH YOUR FRINGE YOU IDIOT AND FIX YOUR GODDAMNED HAIR!" Turles roared, shooting straight up out of his chair. The other producers around him sent him many strange looks as he sat back down and flipped irritably through the paper in front of him. He needed to get out soon; this place was really starting to make him go crazy if all he was worried about was that man's hair. How hard could it be to find two people for a show, just two? That was all he needed. TWO! It shouldn't be this hard!

The man cleared his throat again and Turles had to suppress the urge to yell at the screen.

"Okay...HI! My name is Dakren and this is my job audition for your new interview show!" Oh kami...he sounded happy. Turles groaned. Oh, what it was like to be happy. It felt like YEARS now since he had last been happy. But in reality, it had only been since this morning when he had beaten Raditz and won the last doughnut at breakfast. Yes, he was very happy then.

Turles smiled 'That was a good doughnut, chocolate frosting, colored sprinkles, spongy to bite into...Oh man, I'm hungry.'

"Now, I think I am qualified because-"

"Sweety, just stop now." his camera woman cut in. Turles thanked the girl silently, Dakren did not looked so pleased though. "This is just plain boring, you need personality not qualifications! If your going to be working with these people they need to see who you are!" Dakren sniffed, crossing his arms over his chest in some sort of defiance.

"Kuro this is my au-"

"You sent in your resume, did you not?"

Dakren rolled his eyes "Yes" he drawled.

"Then they know your qualifications, SHOW SOME PERSONALITY! Show what you can handle and what you are like! No doubt these poor people have watched about 6 kagillion of these interviews about 'qualifications.'"

"PRAISE THE LORD!" Turles cried jumping out of his seat again in joy.

"MAKE THEIR DAY ENTERTAINING! It is an interview for a TV show for gods sake! They don't need some yuppy who is just as boring as bat shit."

"HALLELUJAH!" he shouted again.

"How would you feel if you were sitting in a stuffy room all day watching video's! Half of them probably don't even want to be there!!"

"YOU TELL IT SISTER!"

Dakren's eyes widened considerably as he looked at the camera. "What do you suggest?"

The girl was silent for a few moments. "I KNOW!" she shouted, juggling the video camera and going in close to Dakren's face. "FOXY BOXING!" she cheered.

Dakren started.

Producers stared.

Turles stared.

"HOW THE HELL WILL THAT SHOW ANY OF MY PERSONALITY?!" Dakren shouted angrily, snatching the camera away from the girl and pointing it down towards his shoes. He was probably trying to stop the recording, but he wasn't succeeding very well. But he had lovely shoes. Wait, that's not important.

Suddenly, the camera was pointed at the girl, her red hair flashing into view was a tad bit of a surprise. "Hey, nobody cares about you at the moment, get to the foxy boxing! Come on! FOXY BOXING!!"

Turles blinked, this was it! This was his chance to escape! The girl had enough character for him, she'd do fine.

"WE'RE HIRING THAT GIRL!! I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DAMN TV PRODUCERS SAY, EITHER WAY I AM OUT OF THIS ROOM TO GET A BLASTED DOUGHNUT WITH SPRINKLES!" Turles screamed. Then, he blasted a hole in the wall and stomped out whooping and shouting something along the lines of "FREEDOM, OH SWEET FREEDOM!"

"WAIT! Turles even if we hire her you can't leave yet! We still need another reporter!" an unfortunate young producer ran out after him. Why was he unfortunate you ask? He'd just told a Saiyan that he couldn't have his doughnut; that's a BIG no-no! Like one of the biggest no-no's there is! Forget unfortunate, he was DOOMED. Doomed to die a death of a thousand screams. Well, probably just one or two screams actually, since Turles was in a hurry right now. He had a doughnut to get to after all.

"Hey! Is it my turn yet?" someone shouted from behind them.

Turles, who was just about to ki blast the idiot producer who had stopped him from leaving, turned around to see who was yelling at him. A gray-eyed girl with blond hair carrying a rope stood in front of him jumping up and down excitedly....hold on, rope? That was certainly odd...

"Come on, come on, come on! They said I was next! Lemme go! Lemme go!" she begged.

Turles raised an eyebrow questioningly at the rope. "What are you here for?"

Maybe she was here to catch that rogue midget - which would be a great thing! The damned man had escaped into the ventilation system and completely destroyed their air conditioning. Not to mention the horrible smell that the leprechaun possessed, which was NOT GOOD! Plus, he was sure that the short fat man was watching him. Turles couldn't even remember the last time any employee went to the bathroom in this building...

"I wanna be a reporter!" The rope bearing girl shouted. Turles blinked in surprise. Ah dang... Then who was going to catch that blasted leprechaun?! Seriously! He was getting tired of having to go all the way back home to pee.

"Um ookay… Fine girl, you got thirty seconds to impress me." Turles crossed his arms over his chest and glared at her. Dang it! He wanted his doughnut!

"What?! You can't just blow me off like that! I've been waiting for freakin' ever out here! Why do you want to get out of here so bad, huh pal? Got a secret meeting planned?" she eyed Turles suspiciously and marched up to him. "I think you're up to something!"

Turles started to back up. This girl wasn't quite normal and he didn't like to deal with crazy people on an empty stomach. Just then, a lasso appeared around him and he found him self being dragged to the floor. Huh, so that was what the rope was for. Now how about that?

Suddenly, the girl's foot came down on his chest. Crap! She had him cornered. "You know, you're a mighty suspicious character! Just what exactly is your relationship with Goku anyway? Why do you guys look alike? Are you a clone? An evil twin? A BAD PLOT TWIST?!?" Turles started. Now, that was just RUDE. He was a cool bad guy! And why was she comparing him to that idiot?! Just because they LOOKED alike didn't make him a clone! For all she knew, GOKU was the clone!

"And where did you find that freaky planet eating tree in the first place? Does the Department of Agriculture know about that thing? How come you didn't die with the rest of the Saiyans? Where did you pick up those freaky henchmen? And what sort of crazy synapses misfire made you think you could be a FARMER?!" she demanded.

Turles blinked and the group of producers edged away from the two of them. Didn't anybody normal ever show up here? Not that they wanted anybody too normal. But, someone who hadn't fallen out of the loony bin and landed on their head would be nice for a change.

Just then, the girl looked down at her watch and smiled. She quickly undid the rope and stepped back. Turles sat up feeling confused.

"See? I can hog-tie and interrogate the target in thirty seconds!" She grinned.

"Umm, well…this is an interview show not a rodeo-"

"And I have doughnuts." She whipped out a tray of pastries and held it in front of Turles. Turles's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates and he started to drool.

DOUGHNUTS!!!

He looked at them closer. Beautiful sweet tasty wonders! AND THEY HAD SPRINKLES! HOT DANG! He grabbed the tray and looked at the girl. "You got the job!"

Grinning, Turles stood up and began downing doughnuts at the speed of light. "What's your name, anyway?" He asked the girl quickly.

"Um, I go by Veggie Blue Raven, but my real name-"

"Yeah, NO. That's not gonna work. I can't be bothered with remembering all of that. You're Ro from now on."

"But, my name isn't-" the newly dubbed Ro frowned.

"And go catch that midget while your here." he added.

"Midg- wha... Huh?"

But Turles just waved her away, blasted the idiot producer from earlier, and skipped off down the hall with his tray of lovelies. Ah, freedom and doughnuts. What more could a man ask for?

Thus, out of sheer will to be free and the determination to get a doughnut, Kuro and Ro-chan were hired

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**And this...is just the BEGINNING, R&R PLEASE, it makes us happy and increases the chance of us updating BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHA**


	2. Boredom is

**RO- CHAN HERE: WELCOME everybody to the second chapter!! After careful deliberating, sugar highs, cookie wars and fairy floss explosions THIS chapter was finally born!!**

**KURO TIED TO A FAN: . Yeeeeeh**

**RO-CHAN STILL HERE: SO stay in your chair, hand on that mouse and SCROLL down!- OW HEY! DON'T YOU THROW YOUR BOOMERANG AT ME**

**KURO STILL TIED UP: BWAHAHAHAAHHA YOU CAN'T TELL- AAAAHHHH IT'S COMING BACK! UNTIE ME, UNTIE ME - *SMACK* X.X**

**Disclaimer: We do not own ANYTHING DBZ but the story line and ourselves...and that smelly midget in the air vents at headquarters- well at the moment we own him :'(**

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**~Boredom is a dangerous thing...~**

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Goten was bored.

Very, very booored.

He needed to find something, _anything_, to entertain him for a bit.

Well, no, not ANYTHING.

There were a few things he really did _not_ want to find, like the purple three-eyed vampire dust bunnies hiding under his bed. It didn't matter what Gohan said, Goten KNEW they were under there; he heard them! They especially were one of the things he _never_ wanted to find. He might not be able to escape them if they captured him and locked him away deep in their dirty sock mountain and…

Wait, he was getting off track here. Now what was his problem again?

Oh yeah, he was bored.

His mother had gone to the store and his father was off… well, who really knew where Goku went when he disappeared? He could be away leading a renegade army of mutant roosters to war and nobody would really know till later when they had to call the Eternal Dragon to clean up the mess. It was so nice to have a magic planetary cleaning service. Anyway, the point was Goku just wasn't there at the moment. And Gohan was off studying - by studying he meant flirting terribly - at Videl's house.

So due to some MAJOR lack of family communication, the little chibi had been left at home all ALONE.

And now he was _bored._

And _completely unsupervised._

What on earth could be wrong with that scenario?

Sneaking around the house secret agent style, while humming his own theme music, Goten found himself in front of his big brother's room. He had already been everywhere else in the house, including the mahogany cupboard of death in his parents' room. Who knew his father had wardrobe full of such ghastly clothing? Those styles were too old to even be retro… And the shoes! OH THE SHOES! The poor chibi had to find cover from the tsunami wave of footwear out of fear of being drowned. Have you ever nearly drowned in footwear before? No? Well it's _terrifying,_ and it smells funny! It's an awful way to die!

"Target has been reached!" Goten said into his imaginary electric blue walky-talky. "Agent Puppy Chow now going in!"

Looking around suspiciously, Goten inched up to the door and silently eased it open.

"Dun dun duna duuuuhh!" he hummed as he slipped into the room.

"This is Agent Puppy Chow, I'm in the forbidden zone!" he whispered. "Beginning to snoop!"

Goten began pulling random items out of Gohan's dresser and off his shelves for inspection.

Teddy bear underwear, a diary, a picture of Videl in her bathing suit, a note book with Mrs. Videl Son written over and over with little hearts next to it, a box of chocolates that Goten quickly devoured, same old same old stuff ect…

Rats!

No, wait, it was just an old gray glove, not a rodent.

Dang!

There was nothing in here that hadn't been here the last time he and Trunks had played secret agents and searched Gohan's room. Why was his big brother so boring?

Goten was just about to give up and go have some fun setting things on fire when he saw IT. Carefully shoved back into a corner, almost completely hidden from view, was the most amazing thing he'd ever found. Well, not as amazing as that two-headed fish he'd caught outside that nuclear power plant. NOTHING could top that, unless it had three heads or could magically conjure up candy. But, IT was definitely the most amazing thing he'd ever found in his brother's room.

IT was something new, something Agent Puppy Chow had never seen in 'the forbidden zone' before. IT was in an open cardboard box, loosely wrapped in shiny pink paper and surrounded by packing worms. Agent Puppy Chow felt a tingle of excitement run through him, or maybe that was just chocolate sugar buzz kicking in. Wide-eyed, he lifted IT and gently placed the thing on the bed.

'What is this thing?' he wondered as he looked at it. It looked so soft and disgustingly cute, he wanted to cuddle it and blast it in to oblivion all at the same time. Its black empty eyes made him feel uneasy and its frilly red bow was almost nauseating; yet, its freakishly large head looked so squeezable. Plus, its odd shaped body was covered in soft-looking white fur.

Goten's fingers twitched slightly.

He wanted to touch IT.

Giving into the overpowering urge, he reached out nervously and gave it a pet.

Oooooh. Yeaaahhh…

He felt a warm fuzzy feeling engulf him; this was niiiccceee!

What was this strange magic item that he was hugging to his chest? He couldn't seem to quit petting it. IT was just too irresistible.

Oh no, Goten started to panic, he couldn't stop! He couldn't-

DING DONG!

"YIPES!" Goten shouted in surprise when the doorbell suddenly sounded. Dropping IT back onto the bed, he scrambled to see who was at the door.

No sooner had the young chibi left the room, than the window slid open and two excessively leafy bushes climbed into the room.

No, you read that right. We said two bushes.

"What do you know? The ding-dong-ditch really worked." Bush one said in surprise. "I guess I owe you a candy bar."

"Told you so." Said bush number two as it collected the candy bar and then pulled out a shiny red walky-talky. "Ok, Turles we're inside!"

"BIG WHOOP! GET YOUR STORY AND GET BACK HERE!" Turles voice blared back at them. Bush number two grumbled something unintelligible and possibly very mean before putting the walky-talky away.

"Oooh, what's this thing?" Bush one picked up IT from off the bed.

"It looks like a… Hello Kitty Plushie." Bush number two said in disbelief.

The two bushes looked at each other.

"Why does Gohan have a Hello Kitty Plushie?" they both wondered aloud. After the teddy bear underwear neither of them thought Gohan could get any weirder, but he was just full of surprises.

"Um, you know Kuro, the bush costumes were good for outside, but we're a bit conspicuous now, don't you think?" Bush number one looked around the bedroom, adjusting her leaves so she could see better. Dang, she'd lost a bunch of twigs climbing in that window and now her top branches were getting droopy. It was tough being a bush.

"So take it off Ro." Kuro shrugged as she started up her camera and began filming the room.

"I'm trying but I can't. I think Raditz glued the zippers shut." Ro-chan fidgeted as she pulled at the itchy costume. Raditz must have done it when he'd distracted them with that plate of doughnuts. Ro frowned, she should have known that a Saiyan would never just give food away. There had to be a catch.

Kuro paused for a moment before giving her zipper an apprehensive tug.

It refused to budge.

"OH, HE'S GONNA DIE!" she yelled and started to climb out the window, only to find that it had gotten stuck somehow and wouldn't open completely anymore. Blasted windows!

"Wait! Goten's coming back!" Ro-chan hissed frantically.

Indeed, both girls could already here the sound of Goten's approaching footsteps. The two of them looked desperately around the room for a spot to hide. But where can you hide a bush?

"No! We can't get caught on our first assignment!" Kuro said as she desperately flung open the closet door, only to find it was too full to hide in.

"If we go back without a story, Turles is going to make us catch that smelly rouge midget and I don't like leprechauns!" Ro scowled as she checked under the bed. Too small, no way they'd fit.

They heard Goten humming his theme song music just outside the door.

"Gotta hide, gotta hide, gotta hide…" Both girls chanted as they ran in circles. Then, suddenly, they both stopped as an idea hit them.

"SOMBREROS!!" They both shouted.

Goten opened the door and reentered his brother's room. It was very odd, he had answered the door but there wasn't anyone there. So, how come the doorbell rang? He sighed; it must be one of those mysteries of life things.

Anyway, now where was he? Oh right, he had been petting IT, the Hello Kitty Plushie. Goten walked up to the bed and abruptly stopped.

Now THAT had definitely not been in here before. THAT was NOT something he would overlook. No, sometime in between when he had left the room, and when he came back, THAT had appeared.

Goten eyed THAT thoughtfully.

This could mean one thing and one thing only.

Goten picked up THAT and the Hello Kitty Plushie from off of the bed and turned to face two sweating sombrero wearing bushes.

"Hello Kitty is MAGIC!!!" Goten shouted.

Whooping in joy, he danced around the room as he waved Kuro's candy bar in the air ecstatically. It had gotten dropped on the bed accidentally by the girls. "IT'S MAGIC AND IT SENT ME A CANDY BAR!" IT was officially the most amazing thing he had ever found!! HA! TAKE THAT TWO HEADED FISH!

"I gotta tell Trunks!" the chibi yelled as he raced from the room and out the front door.

"Hey that's mine!" Kuro jumped to her feet and raced after him with Ro-chan right behind her.

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**Finally it's POSTED HHEHEHHEHEHHEHEHEHE**

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**GCTIGERFAN1**

_Ro-chan:_ Yah yah I know *goes back to writing updates* Thanks a bunch, no TWO bunches! Um, b/c he's evil, kinda fun, and he's a minor character. (Whose gonna care if Turles is OOC? And it leaves all the main guys free for us to torture! =D) YAY COOKIES!!!!

_Kuro_: BWAHAHAAHHAA Authoress abilities strike again GO RO! *High fives...Where'd she go?* Eerrrm anyway- WHELP we start out with him because....I dunno- AAAAAHHHHHH COOKIIESSS AAAAAARRRGGHHHHH!! GIMME GIMME GIMME WAAHAHAHAHHAA

**sisi123456123456**

_Ro-chan:_ Alright. 0o…

_Kuro:_ OKAAAAAAAAAY o.o

**AquaMarias**

_Ro-chan:_ lol, someplace truly unique no doubt. ^^

_Kuro:_ It will probably lead us to the firey depths of HFIL- After being sent there by everybody in this story....Yeh most likely

**Blissey**

_Ro-chan:_ Thankies! That's what we were aiming for, I think… no,wait, yes it was. ^^ lol, enjoy hun!

_Kuro: _GLAD you like it! hope this update was good =D

**Goten-kun**

_Ro-chan: _lol, Ok, thanks!

_Kuro:_If you want a Lasso you have to be careful...they are very temperamental . and hard to get out of

**Gokuswife**

_Ro-chan:_ ok, since you asked nicely. =D

_Kuro: _Say please and you shall RECEIVE :)

**StephanG**

_Kuro:_YAY Glad you think it's brilliant!!! I really like that word...BRILLIAAAANT-uhhh anyway, hope this update was quick enough :)

_Ro-chan:_ That's what we love to hear! Thank you, we'll do our best. Next? Muhahaha! You never know…

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**AHAHHA CHAPTER ONE IS UP AND RUNNING- Crap HE FELL OVER- OH look he got back up again...what? He is a SHE!?! BUT I NAMED HER KEVIN!!!**

**REVIEWS ARE VERY MUCH LOVED-- SO ARE COOKIES AND FIRST AID KITS, SO PRESS THE BUTTON AND TELL US WHAT YOU THINK =D BYEE!**


	3. The KittyNapper

**KURO HERE AGAIN- YES I SURVIVED: HELLOOO again, and congratulations, you have made it to the 3RD CHAPTER!!**

**RO-CHAN COMING THROUGH: We worked real hard on this one and it turn it grew and grew and TURNED INTO THIS MONSTER OF A CHAPTER**

**KURO BACK: Yep, we like to call her....KEVINSTEIN BWAHAHAHHAHAHAHA**

**RO-CHAN: Thats just stupid**

**KURO: I'd like to see YOU come up with a better name for her!!**

**RO-CHAN: How about we just call the chapter 'The kitty-napper'**

**KURO:...fine**

**Disclaimer: We no own ANYTHING but the crazy blond and red-head that just constantly appear in this fic, we would appreciate it if we were not kidnapped while we are sleeping, we have enough trouble beating off that bloody boogieman  
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**~ The Kitty-Napper ~**

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A smile was etched on Gohan's face as he walked through the front door of his house. Today had been great...no scratch that. TODAY HAD BEEN ABSOLUTELY FABULOUSLY AWESOME!

And before you ask no! He was not exaggerating, and this is why:

Today, he had finally had a full day, repeat _full day_, to hang out with Videl, WITHOUT ANY INTERRUPTIONS!

Sure, there had been other days that he had been able to hang out with her after the whole Buu incident, but they were always being interrupted. Plus, those interruptions were prone to occur at the worst possible times. Like when he had invited Videl over for lunch one day. Oh God, that had been bad! Everything was going smoothly, then Goku and Goten had trampled through the house riding on a herd of triceratops because "They were so much better then horses!"

Well, Gohan had to admit that the two had a point. Triceratopses were better than horses when you thought about it. They had HORNS! THREE of them! Did horses have horns? No, which was why they weren't as cool triceratopses. Plus, they were dinosaurs; dinosaurs always topped mammals on the cool chart. But still, his father and brother didn't need to ride a whole HERD of them trough the house or over the top of Videl's jet-copter.

Then there was that other time, he was out to dinner with Videl when Krillen and Master Roshi had called, begging him to help them. It had been a nice evening until he had to go catch two coffee-buzzed chibis, who were at the North City festival using the Ferris Wheel as a Frisbee and surfing on a sea of cotton candy. Gohan would never look at the fluffy pink concoction the same way again.

Or, Gohan's personal favorite, the time he had been actually STUDYING with Videl in the library. Just studying, honestly! Then Hurcule had come running in out of nowhere, wearing some kind of medieval armor, while screaming for his life with the Prince of all Saiyans tailing close behind. That would normally be bad enough, but a homicidal Vegeta, wrapped in toilet paper, shooting ki blasts down the isles, and yelling profanities and death threats much more graphic than his usual tirades, was like the kiss of death to Gohan's date with Videl. Er, he meant his social outing with Videl. Yeah, social outing…

Anyway, Gohan knew that the 'Earth's strongest warrior' was a pain in the ass, and even he felt tempted to play a game of 'Whac-A-Hurcule' now and then. But, how Hurcule ever got Vegeta to go after him so far away from Capsule Corp, AND managed to wrap him in toilet paper, stumped the older demi each and every time. Seriously, how did one TP _Vegeta_? Plus, there was always the question of WHY Hurucle would even attempt to do such a thing. The man didn't appear to be suicidal, and he certainly wasn't big on the whole courage thing. Though, Gohan had an inkling that Hurcule was somehow influenced by Buu.

But regardless of all that, yes absolutely fabulously awesome pretty much summed up how good and relaxed he felt after his da… er, social outing with Videl.

Striding happily through the living room, Gohan chirped a cheerful hello to Goten and Trunks. He noted that the onyx and lavender chibis were arguing about candy creating gods and were surrounded by all sorts of sugary treats, but somehow the scene didn't _REALLY COMPLETELY_ register.

Kind of like when you see a toga wearing elephant hiding in a cherry tree and you just hand the semi-creepy ice-cream man his money, take your slightly melted orange push-up, and keep right on walking. Then, you wake up in the middle of the night two weeks later going "Wait- what the heck-?"

Or maybe, that only happens to us…

For Gohan though, that sort of thing would usually set off all sorts of warning bells in his head, but this time he simply ignored it. The chibis, treats, and candy creating divinities thing that is, not the elephant.

Nope, nothing was worrying him today. All was well in Gohan's world; that is, until he got to his room.

If he had been in some kind of cartoon, like an anime, DOOM would have flown over his head in big scary capital letters. You know the kind. They most likely would have been carmine red and accompanied by some dramatic background music as well.

Why? Simple, because _somebody _had been in his room.

_Somebody _had thrown all his things on the ground.

And _somebody _had STOLEN FROM HIM!

Gohan stared at the room in horror.

IT WAS GONE!

THE HELLO KITTY PRESENT FOR VIDEL!!

He repressed a dramatic "NOOOO" and instead stood numbly in his room. In all his life, he had never been robbed! This was the most shocking thing that had ever happened to him!

Gohan had fought against 3 alien tyrants, one mutated monster created by the cells of him and his comrades, and had died once. He had seen his brother nearly destroy the world after inhaling too much sugar, had watched his mother take out a Super Saiyan with simple cooking utensils, and had been called on to save the innocent people of Capsule Corp from a pink singing dinosaur created by the C.C. heiress herself. (He still had flashbacks about that last one...oh god how those horrible karaoke songs haunted his dreams) And yet, this single event was still more shocking than any of those things.

Gohan scanned the room suspiciously. Leaves on the floor, window slightly open, closet door ajar, and packing worms trailed towards his bed.

After watching so many detective shows in his life, Gohan knew how to read clues. It was as clear as day, all the signs pointed to a robbery.

And they had taken his Hello Kitty!

It had to be a robber! Or kitty-napper, whichever way you wanted to describe it. Goten was the only one home...oh and Trunks. But it's not like they would invade his room, look through his things, then take a Hello Kitty plushie.

Would they?

Gohan snorted, yeah right! Next, the two would start to worship the plushie and offer it sacrifices.

"That's just stupid, not even they would be that ridiculous." he muttered to himself.

Frowning, Gohan thought about his situation. This was a big problem. He had been robbed, so what should he do about it? There was no real evidence, other than the leaves and the window. So, somebody must have climbed through it and taken his doll...but what to do next?

He couldn't be Saiyaman and search the city, too many news reporters would follow him and ask him questions. Saiyaman was a superhero, he couldn't admit to being robbed! It was oxymoronic!

Plus, he couldn't very well tell people, 'I am looking for my hello kitty plushie!' Even in Saiyaman's heroic voice that sounded stupid! And Saiyaman couldn't be portrayed as stupid! He had a reputation of being AWESOME!

There was always the choice of asking somebody if they had seen it, excluding Trunks and Goten though. Gohan didn't want a repeat of the 'Son house security system' again, which would surely go back into effect if his brother told his mom that they'd been robbed. Burglars or not, Gohan didn't think he could survive another Ki enhanced taser attack, he still had occasional twitches at night from that last one. And all because he didn't do the secret knock, WHICH by the way he was never told! All he had known at the time was the secret call, where to find the secret key and the secret password. NOTHING about a KNOCK! He'd have remembered if there were a knock mentioned in the 'Son security instillation and orientation meeting; he'd taken notes!

But, at least he wasn't the only one to have an unfortunate experience during that horrible week. Misery really does love company, and he had not been short on companions. Yamcha had gotten trapped in a high-voltage electronic web; Krillen had gotten locked in the fridge at one point. But, when Vegeta was tackled and knocked into a pit of smelly green goo -who knows WHAT the heck that had been made out of - the 'Son house security' abruptly ended with a bang. Literally!

But, he was starting to digress and it wasn't being of any help. He was still in a dilemma here!

Then suddenly, like a miracle, his closet door opened and revealed something he thought he would never use. Something he had bought long ago on impulse and in hopes of using it one day when he really needed it. It would seem that fate had decreed that day to be now.

Smiling like a loon, he reached up and picked it out of his closet.

He could swear he heard an angelic harmony as it came out into the light.

His detective costume, probably a few sizes too small but who cared! This was his time to join the hallowed ranks of men who fought crime on the frontlines! The bloodhounds of truth, leading Lady Justice to render judgment on society's hidden evils.

Gohan was so engrossed in the moment that he didn't even notice the two leaf clad reporters sneaking past his room.

"What is that sound? You hear it too right?" Ro asked quietly, trying to find the source of the heavenly music. The Doctor had assured her that she would stop hearing those weird things after the cold pills wore off. At least they were supposed to be cold pills, but that Doctor had seemed a little iffy… what with the eye patch, the talking armadillo, and all.

Kuro fidgeted with her costume violently. "Somebody keeps on sending me text messages!" she growled as the tone started again.

* * *

_  
Back at HQ..._

_Raditz punched in another message on his cell phone._

_"Kuro, bring me a doughnut - Raditz"_

_SEND!_

_Ah, wasn't unlimited texting awesome? Now he could simply hound people until they finally caved in and bowed to his will, He typed in another message:_

_Kuro, BRING ME A DOUGHNUT WITH SPRINKLES NOW! – Raditz_

_SEND!_

_Oh yeah, he could do this all day…  
_

* * *

Returning to the girls…

"Augh, there it goes again! This stupid costume wont let me- Wait was that Gohan?" Kuro stopped abruptly, her costume rebellion temporarily forgotten.

"I don't know." The blond whispered "Hey, do you hear drums?"

Both listened intently, there were indeed drums playing downstairs. Like scary ominous jungle drums! This had to be good, or at least somewhat interesting. Unless they had suddenly been transported in the middle of a jungle where cannibalistic jungle residents were performing a ritual to eat them, which would be scary. Luckily, they were still in the house.

"Forget the phone, get your camera ready." Ro said sneaking off downstairs with bush number two close behind her.

Trunks stared up at the Hello Kitty doll curiously. What had gotten his best friend to believe that this big headed, cuddly looking plushie was magical?

"Goten it's not magical, its just a toy." the purple haired demi argued tiredly, ignoring the documentary on 'How to please your god' blaring quite loudly on the television. Who knew there was a video like that? Seriously, who in the world thought, "Hey, somebody might find a god that nobody has heard about, so they NEED to know how to worship it! We can make a documentary and everything for them!" Trunks really wanted to meet this person, and slap them.

"It is TOO magical!!!" Goten pouted and stomped his foot indignantly.

"How?" Trunks challenged.

"IT MADE THIS CANDY BAR!" Goten shouted holding up his miracle treat.

Why would nobody believe him? He had told Aunt Bulma but she had just patted him on the head and said he must have dreamed it. BUT THAT WAS NOT WHAT HAPPENED!!

Okay yes, the time when he told her that the mole-men had kidnapped him and made him their nacho cheese duke of appetizers, he had been dreaming. Which was strange because he had no idea what a duke was. But THIS time it was DIFFERENT! He was POSITIVE he was AWAKE!

Trunks snatched the candy bar from him with a huff and looked it over. "Yeah, a LOW SUGAR candy bar."

'Yuck!' Trunks winced; low sugar was the worst. He was a sugar purest, he felt like a sellout just holding the thing. "What kind of all powerful god would give us a low sugar candy bar?"

The chibi Goku clone crossed his arms indignantly. "A good responsible one...he knows I have cavities. SEE!! HE KNOWS EVERYTHING!"

This was not getting anywhere. "HE is wearing a pink bow." Trunks pointed out.

"So what? He can like pink." Goten said defensively.

"Not if he's a guy, he can't." Trunks rolled his eyes. "Real guys don't wear pink. I mean, can you picture my Dad in pink? It would never happen in a million years!"

"He's not a guy, he's a kitty god." Goten mumbled.

Trunks poked the soft toy. "His head looks like it'll pop at any moment, AND it's fluffy and GIRLY… WHY is it a he?"

"Because he just is."

Muttering under his breath, Trunks switched off the TV, the drumbeat turning off with it.

"Okay, if IT is magical, prove it." he said.

Really, if Goten had told him that he was taking him to see a magical Hello Kitty doll, then he wouldn't have come. They could be doing some totally awesome stuff right now if not for this. Stuff like moving a gremlin-infested mountain to the middle of the city. Hey! That sounded cool! He would have to remember that for next time.

Goten thought about this. "Hmm, okay. But, you have to stand back and be quiet." he said in a hushed tone.

Gently, the younger demi placed the Hello Kitty on the coffee table and knelt down before it.

"OH great and noble Hello Kitty god, bringer of the magical candy bar, show us your power 'cause TRUNKS doesn't believe me and I am NOT making it up!"

The drums blasted back on quickly as the television came alive. Trunks yelped in fright and hid behind his best friend.

Oh crap! Goten was right!

As Trunks looked up at the hello kitty, he could swear he heard angels singing.

"You're standing on the TV remote Ro! SCRAMBLE!!" Kuro whisper shouted. (Oh come on, you all know exactly what that is.)

Both bushes ducked and rolled away- well attempted to until Ro found that one of her branches had decided to cling to the couch! It didn't help any that Kuro's phone went off again. Thank you Raditz… Where did she get that ring-tone anyway?

"Turn it off!" Ro said nervously, pulling at the stubborn branch that seemed like it WANTED to get her busted.

Kuro pulled at the zipper frantically as she crouched next to the blond. You never leave a bush behind!

"What do you think I've been trying to do for the past 10 minutes?" Kuro frowned. If only she'd remembered her pocketknife, she could go Swiss Army on this sucker!

Ro gave the redhead a blank stare. "Trying to steal your candy bar back."

The red head went silent. Guilty was stamped across her forehead. She'd have to remember to wash that off later.

"While that may be true," Kuro coughed, "I have also been trying to turn my phone off. Some of us are capable of multitasking."

The two sighed in relief once the phone stopped ringing. Kuro swore when she found out who was sending her all these texts, she was going to do something very mean and probably very painful to their person. Plans were already starting to form…

It would seem, however, that the chibis were too preoccupied to consider the girls' suspicious racket worth investigating.

* * *

Meanwhile in Gohan's room…

RIIIPPP!!

"Not a problem, I know how to fix that!" Gohan grunted as he pulled the detective costume pants on. All he needed was his desk stapler and some tape.

Broing!

He heard another seam let go as he buttoned up the shirt. "Still not a problem." Gohan huffed, his chest feeling more than a little constricted.

RIP!

SREECH!!

ERRRRK!!!

BROING!!!!

BINK!!!!!

"Alright, now that might be a problem…" Gohan said, looking down at his clothes. It looked as if he had gone all Hulk on his detective outfit. He was gonna need a LOT of tape…

* * *

In the living room…

The two reporters popped their heads over the side of the couch

"What are they doing?" Kuro asked looking at the busy chibi's. Dang, her candy bar was still way out of reach.

"It looks like they are building an altar for the Hello Kitty." Ro answered

"An altar? Out of what? They have some sticky tape and a cardboard box." Kuro shook her head.

Ro sighed. "Would you rather them build an altar out of animal skins and bones?"

"…No."

"Then quit complaining about their lack of construction materials."

"Hey, if you're going to build an altar, do it right! Use Play-do!"

"…"

Meanwhile, the two demi-Saiyans were doing a pretty good job on the altar, or to any other person who happened to see them, the box with too much sticky tape wrapped around it. Candles and sugar also surrounded it. Now, that was an ant infestation just waiting to happen.

Kuro pouted "Besides, I'm frustrated and leafy, complaining comes with part of the package."

"A package?" Ro cocked her head to the side.

"Yeah, we're both a package deal." Kuro told her.

"Does Turles know that?"

"Yes, but fortunately we came without a return address. So, he's stuck with us. No give backs."

"Oh…"

"Hey, that IS Gohan!" Ro spoke up after a few minutes, pointing to the dressed up detective heading out the door. "He is up to something, I think one of us should follow him."

That was true, anybody dressed like that was either going to a dress up party, school, or was gonna do something worth taping.

"Well, I want to stay and see what's happening here." Kuro looked at her. Her candy bar was still here! Low sugar or not it was still hers!!

Ro frowned. "I wanted to stay here too."

Well who wouldn't? It wasn't everyday that you got to see something horrifically amusing unfold. By horrifically she meant that it obviously wouldn't end well, by amusing...that pretty much spoke for itself.

"You're the mystery otaku, you follow Mr. Private eye." Kuro argued.

"But you've got the camera!" Ro retorted.

"Use the camera on your phone."

"You know that won't work."

"Rock paper scissors?" Kuro finally suggested, her hand poised for battle.

...

...

...

...

"HAHA! I win, now go!" Kuro danced in glee. She was the rock-paper-scissors champion! Take that world! It was all in the attitude folks.

"Gah! I panicked at the last moment and picked paper… Why did the fates make me so lousy at games of chance?" Ro pouted. "Best two out of three? Come on pal!"

"No, I beat you! Now, go tail that sleuth!" Kuro grinned, rubbing her hands together.

In front of the altar, Trunks stepped back and surveyed the boys' handy work.

"Looks great Goten! Now all we need are the SACRIFICES!" he smirked and Goten cheered.

_*Silence*_

_..._

_..._

_..._

_..._

_...  
_

"GOOD LUCK KURO!"

Ro waved as she made a dash for the exit and followed after Gohan.

* * *

**HUZAAAAH KEVINSTEIN CAN RUN- Damnit woman PUT YOUR LEG BACK ON- Don't you throw your arm at me!!**

**--**

**Son Venvor**

_Ro:_ Yup yup, Gohan too! lol, thankies!

_Kuro:_ Ahaha yeh,...he gets it from his dad o.o

**J.W. Appel**

_Ro:_ Uh well, we're on a roll and actuall have a PLAN for this story (despite how it looks like, this was not COMPLETELY random stuff we just scribbled down lol) so no requests right now. Our piggy bank of odd ideas is turned in to a fat little porker. Thanks for reading though. ^^

_Kuro:_ I agree with Ro :) But thank you so much for reading an reviewing :)

**Santified**

_Ro:_ YAY! Somebody else called us brilliant! Twice! It is OFFICIAL now! Lol. HEY! What do ya mean crap?! . You said brilliant! Brilliant crap??? Oo An oxymoron!

_Kuro:_ YAAAY ANOTHER BRILLIANT!!!! WOOH....crap? WHAT?! BRILLIANT CRAP!! Woah we created a whole new type of fanfic o.o

**GCTIGERFAN1**

_Ro:_ HIHI! Hehe, yes Goten is cute isn't he? Lol, shoes ^^ that was Kuro's brilliance at work. =D Yay! I'm clever! X3 Good, we're definitely going to need those Band-Aids after the whole sacrifice thing…

_Kuro: _G-GIANT bandaids...AWESSSSOOOOOME!! Yes yes, he has lots of shoes and tons of horrible clothing hehehehhe poor poor goten, never saw those shoes coming....

**sisi123456123456**

_Ro:_ lol, at least now you know why he does. Thank you!

_Kuro:_ Come on he has teddy bear underwear, why NOT a hello kitty plushie!! LMAO

--

**Warning: Authors become ecstatically happy when they receive lots of reviews**

**They run around crazily and eventually crash into a wall**

**:) We enjoy it as much as you readers would =D**

**R&R PLEAAAASE**


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